Facebook Trolling: Tara

Tara: I decided that I want to grow wings! =) It would make life tons easier if we could all just fly where ever we needed to go. Don't you agree!! =)

Lindsay: I am currently selling some giant wings made up of smaller bug wings. I haven't tested how much weight they can hold, but that's part of the fun of buying them and figuring it out for yourself. Once as a child I jumped of a hill while I had some wings strapped on. While in the air a low flying airplane sucked me into the turbine, which was quite painful, and is the cause for my wretched back aches and constant limb failure. Sometimes I cannot feel my head, which must be what a helium filled balloon must feel like. As my body is very string like, I feel that that would be an accurate comparison. When I was sucked into the turbine my carefully constructed wings were torn to shreds, as well as my Smurf shirt. To this day you can find remnants of my shredded Smurf shirt, as well as the remains of my purple sweat pants, and snow boots. 

Tara: Okay Lindsay, First off... You are the funniest human being on the face of the freakin' planet! And Second, is there anyway I could get a pair of those Giant wings made up of smaller bug wings. I'm thinking they maybe, just might work for me. If I can just build up my faith and BELIEVE that I will fly.. It just might really happen! And I figure if I talk to myself with brief encouragement.. such as "I think I can" I think I can" then the hope of getting into the air might be a little bit stronger. I'm hoping the Low flying airplane doesn't mess up my plan, because i think it might ruin my determination toward growing wings and may lead into severe disappointment's if IT tries getting in my way. One more thing, I can't live without my purple sweatpants, so please tell that Mr. airplane to stay out of my way, because Tara is in the Flying range now and if it's not careful I just might pull out my turbines!!! Just a little warning! Thanks! You are a GREAT Friend! =)

Lindsay: Tara, as you are the first person to express interest for the wings, I do not currently have all the pairs of bug wings that I need to make the bigger wings. Also I spent most of my time in the womb making those wings, and they were not finished until I was seven.

As for the low flying plane, when I was sucked in I made sure to jam my arms into the propellers to make sure that everyone on the plane knew that I was there.

I am still searching for all of the pieces of my Smurf shirt, as well as my beloved sweat pants. Once I have all of the pieces I intend to sew them together and wear that outfit repeatedly. I have found all of my snow boot pieces, and I have used advanced technology to piece them back together, like a pirate would do with a torn treasure map.