A Night on the Town with Kristen and Lindsay

A few weeks ago my sister, Kristen and I went out for a little break from our terrible monstrously awful lives. We went to the movie Immortals (movie review: http://nerdyshirt.blogspot.com/2011/11/movies-with-lindsay-immortals.html) and grabbed a bite at Subway. First our experience with Immortals. We saw this movie in 3D so we were given those classy stylish nerdy sunglasses.

The attractive hot date snatchers.

The second that we walked into the theater Kristen and I both noticed something. There were three other people besides us to see the movie. Three ancient other people. Honestly, all three were horribly old people. What were they doing at a movie like this? Who knows? Perhaps they thought that the shirtless Henry Cavill on the promotional poster indicated a good rebellious movie to go to on their escape from the old folks home.

The grandpas and grandmas from Hell.

After the initial shock of the Jurassic people we were going to see the movie with, we headed up the stairs. Kristen pounded her way to the top, shocking the fossils in their seats as they turned down their hearing aids. We found our seats on the back row, where we wouldn't have to crane our necks at a one hundred eighty degree angle to see the movie. The advertisements before the movie started, which was our cue to put on our attractive glasses. Kristen said to me, "The screen looks funny without the glasses." What I heard, "You look funny with those glasses." I replied with, "YOU LOOK FUN---Oh. Yeah it does." It's moments like this that make me feel like all the other dinosaurs in the theater. An advertisement for the latest Underworld movie appeared to which Kristen said, "Kate Beckinsale is ugly and a bad actress. She always wears that stupid leather suit." So true. During the movie we kept looking sideways at each other when something stupid or questionable happened as all super cool people do. After the movie we headed to Walmart to get groceries and we stopped at the Subway in the Walmart. After deciding what we wanted, we went to get our food. For a while nobody was behind the counter so several loud noises later, a guy that looked like an escaped convict disguised as a Subway employee came out. He said to me, "Eh wat gechuy?" Standing there with big vacant eyes I was furiously trying to figure out what he said. I could hear Kristen's brain whirring to figure out his puzzle language as well. Finally he said louder, "What can I get you?" Feeling like a complete idiot, I sheepishly told him what I wanted. After I told him  he screamed "what?!" I repeated myself. "What?!" One more time. Finally got it. The next painful question came. "Ew wamba to sed?" Not again. What did the tattooed little monkey want this time? "What?", I asked. "DO. YOU. WANT. IT. TOASTED?" "Oh, yes.""What?!" "YES!!!" After Kristen went through the same painful process of shouting at Charles Manson what she wanted we finally were able to eat. We got the groceries and went home afterward, and slept of our misery like slugs covered in salt.